Apparently, comparing Michael Bay to Hitler didn't exactly please Steven Spielberg and that's why she isn't in the new movie. As always, I am 100% Team Spielberg.

This is a woman who is clearly familiar with double-stick tape. But maybe she needed to air them out?

We look and look and look at this photo but we have NO idea whether or not she has gut. Are we blind? Or do we just expect our bikini guts these days to be as flat as flat can be? We're picking up a Victoria Secret catalog to find out.

Here's an alleged screen shot of the Jimmy Kimmel sex tape. It's okay if you don't believe it exists, because it probably doesn't. We hope it doesn't.

Today, we're all Michael Jackson. Or we mourn Michael Jackson. Ah, whatever. We're just really, really sad.

If you're wondering who Leighton Meester is, this is her. TMZ is reporting she has a sex tape that's being shopped around Hollywood. And it involves her feet. Sexy!

This is the extent of Bret Michael's injuries after a prop kicked his ass at the Tony's last week.

We'd love to skateboard on this if only to a rim job of the rails on a half pipe. (wait...we're trying to talk Sk8r. Did that make any sense?)

Check out the new Michael Phelps Garbage Fail Kid. Collect all the new Garbage Fail Kids and post them on your blog! Come back for more week after week!

We don't care that she's a hundred years old or banged Michael Bolton. Nicolette is bangin'.

Where is Michael Phelps' dad? He's in some pool eating small children/midgets.

Paraguayan Olympian Leryn Franco will never date you or Michael Phelps. So just shut it.

Everyone laughs at her now but when that Quato she's holding inside of her pops its head out and holds the secrets to humanity's survival, she'll be the one laughing.

Crank 2 will do very well in DVD rentals where teenage boys can enjoy the "film" in the proper setting.

Britney's secret to weight loss is apparently time travel which raises the very real possibility of an alternate 2003 being created where she never meets K-Fed.

There's a catch, they used tape and a guitar to cover the nasty bits so you're eyes wouldn't be as scared as Amy's arm after a night with Blake and crack.

Michael Bolton and Nicolette Sheridan's new ad for London Fog is really weird and disturbing but so are guys who wear London Fog jackets so it works.

This TV anchor has the same disease that Michael Jackson "supposedly' has.

No Michael, we didn't come to see you. We are here for your delicious breads and pastries. Duh…

I guess these silly Asians don't know that's a word that only black people can use.